A Determination to Succeed
In 2022, Tarique Chowdhury surprised his family, friends and medical consultants by deciding to have his left leg – previously wrought with infection problems - amputated. Since then, he’s not only learned to walk again, but is living as full a life as possible. We headed out to The Hollies in Meanwood, Leeds, for a portrait shoot and to catch up about how he’s thriving in his new world.
Tell us a bit about how you got to where you are now.
I picked up an infection in my left foot around 2018, perhaps from something I stepped on. As a person living with Type 2 Diabetes, I’ve always been more prone to infections like this spreading. Previous injuries had always healed, and so I thought it would get better, despite five years of the infection and wound reoccurring. This particular infection led to a toe amputation in 2019 and another in 2020, plus a few spells as a hospital inpatient.
My Doctors’ had talked about a possible lower leg amputation for three years and I had refused, largely fearing what it would mean for my life with my teenage children. So, they were surprised when in August 2022, I suggested it, and elected to have it done as soon as possible.
What changed your mind?
My mindset was more positive then about how an amputation would actually enhance my future life, and I was ready for it.
It was a surreal period really - having your lower leg amputated over two operations in a week and recovering on a ward whilst the main topic of conversation was the death of the Monarch!
My initial reaction was not of loss, but of uncertainty about how things might change, how I would get about and how soon I could start my rehabilitation – which in fact was within days. Physiotherapy became the thing I looked forward to each morning.
What were the biggest challenges?
The challenges have been quite varied. From forgetting I had lost my lower leg at the beginning while trying to stand up from a chair, to falling out of bed. It’s funny at one level but it was also a shock at times.
I have been determined to get as back to normal as I can. I feel I’ve come a long way, though it has been a big challenge to stay motivated. It would have been easy to rely on being pushed in a wheelchair, or driven everywhere, but that isn’t me – I value my independence and in that, being able to contribute and help others too.
When recovering in hospital in 2022, I would be knocking on the door of the Physiotherapy Team each morning, sometimes before their first coffee, to get started. To this they would jokingly respond “Tarique, there are different ways patients deal with having physio … those who won’t, those who (think they) can’t …. And you!” I’m proud of that.
How would you describe the physical and emotional obstacles?
My biggest challenges were in my own mind. These made me anxious at times, and were linked to practical things, like how I would cope in our three-storey home, get my children Jasmin and Lukas to school and to their various activities.
I was told I would need a commode, frequent nursing visits to use the toilet or bathe. Also, that I would need assistance to get out of my home in a wheelchair. I was encouraged to consider moving my cooker into another room, and even to move home completely.
With the support of family, friends and physiotherapists, from day one I was mobile, found ways to climb the stairs for the bathroom and my own bedroom, moving independently (initially with a wheelchair). I then graduated to crutches and up to where I am now - with a prosthetic leg, but still able to walk and drive myself.
I miss not being able to run, though I’m working on that with the charity, LimbPower, who help adult and children amputees to stay active and get back to normality as much as possible. Without the prosthetic leg my life would be less mobile, less independent and the situation would no doubt have a more negative impact on my own mental health.
How did other people react to your decision and the result?
The experience has brought out the best in my family and friends. Jasmin and Lukas have both been unwavering in how they have been there for their ‘old man’, never complaining about the times I used to be a little withdrawn, even grumpy, and they’re always there to help. My friends have been there with kind words, a listening ear and practical support. The experience has strengthened some friendships, both ways.
What do you want people to know about your experience?
I am me - If anything, new and improved. I want people to know I am capable, and able.
I found that suddenly, even from well-meaning people, everyone became an expert about amputations and prosthetics, with some telling me how I should feel or what I should do next. I may sound ungrateful for their interest; however, I maintain that it’s important to first listen to anyone who has had this experience and to ask questions.
At a time when for many such a procedure might have been the biggest thing in their lives, knocked their self-confidence or just caused a roadblock in their thoughts about what comes next, it’s important to avoid causing doubt at a time when they need help to move on. That was my emotional experience.
I wish I had known that there were lonely times because there are. These are times when even when there is someone in the house with me, that I get lost in my thoughts and wonder if I am the only one like this. Of course, I know I’m not, but the mind wanders, doesn’t it?
Has the amputation shifted your outlook on life?
There are some scary studies suggesting that life expectancy of those with a lower limb amputation and diabetes drops significantly. Of course, that is just an average, though reading it in black and white certainly focusses my mind, and my outlook on what comes next.
Having had a lower leg amputation, and the rehabilitation that followed, has made me more determined to make the most of things, and time with the people who matter to me, especially Jasmin and Lukas, my children.
Since getting back on my feet a year ago (literally!) I have tried wheelchair rugby, am back in the gym, have flown overseas three times, taken a cruise with my children, and driven again in an automatic car for thousands of miles. I’m now centred on developing my skills and business as a leadership coach. My view is that I have a lot to live, and a lot to give – so let’s get on!!